I have struggled with what to write about for my first “official” blog. I have many notebooks loaded with ideas. Copious notes I have started writing but nothing is finished or titled. When I really started thinking about it, the whole idea for whoneedsaman.com is to empower others and bring some humor and happiness in the process.
As humans, we posses a wonderful power; the power to choose what kind of life we are going to live. We can choose joy and to focus on the positive aspects of our life. Conversely, we can choose unhappiness and focus only on the negative. I’m not saying that we can ignore the negative things. Life will always throw curve-balls at us. It’s about how we react and our perception of the situations that are happening in our lives. I always look for the silver lining , or the glitter as I like to call it.
Why do I call it glitter? It just happened one day… One of my dear friends is very OCD, while I am the complete opposite. During Halloween we dress up and go to a neighborhood costume party. My costume always involves glitter. I leave a trail of it wherever I go. She freaks out because of the glitter trails I leave. Months after the costume has been put away, there are still remnants of glitter wherever I go. She was complaining one day because there was glitter in her car, in her house , on her, on me, in my house. I just looked at her and said , “Glitter happens!” I suggested that whenever she sees the glitter, to associate something positive with it. To think of me, the joy and friendship we share whenever glitter appears rather than associating it with something you have to get rid of or clean up and make it go away. Seriously, have you ever tried to completely get rid of glitter? It’s impossible, so you might as well learn to live with it. Life happens.. we have to deal with life and what it throws at us. You just have to look for the glitter that is hiding where you least expect it.
There are situations in life where there is just nothing positive about it. While you are in the middle of a crisis it is hard to see any good that can come of it. Often times when you look back after you are out of the middle of it, you can see the glitter that was there all along! What do you do in the meantime when you just can’t see the glitter? Make your own glitter!
How can you make glitter when there is none in sight, you ask? Find a reason to celebrate! Celebrate your victories. It can be something as small as getting out of bed and taking a shower , or as big as a job promotion or a wedding. Buy yourself flowers, cook a special dinner and eat on the fine china (even if you are dining alone). Wear a Tiara or a crown.. something I do often. Take care of you and do some self care. If you are not taking care of yourself, you can’t be good for you or anyone else. It is much harder to have a positive outlook when your mental and physical health is poor. For me, self care is going to the gym, taking long walks with my dog, getting my nails done, meditating, spending times with my friends and family.. living in the moment . Find things you enjoy that make you happy and allow you to take a mental vacation from the stress. For me, meditation is a great mental escape. I do it often. If you don’t know how to meditate, do a google search for guided meditation and give it a try. You will be pleasantly surprised!
I have a friend who asked me how I even got out of bed every day and managed to be so happy. At that time, I had lost my job, was about to lose my house, and some days I didn’t know how I was going to feed the kids or pay the power bill. I was also in the process of filing bankruptcy. Looking at that situation.. lets be honest. How in the hell could any human being be happy? I was happy because I found the glitter! My glitter is all of the positive things in my life. During that time, I had many wonderful friends to support me and walk through all the tough times . Those friends are still in my life. My life has always been full of blessings, mostly the people that are a part of my life. I chose to see the blessings rather than all the negative things. I found humor, even in that situation. No matter how bad it gets, I have always chosen to focus on the positive, to find the humor, even when there were abundantly more negative things than positive things to see.
I never ignored the negative. If you don’t address the negative issues, they don’t go away. NEWS FLASH… they fester and get worse. I deal with them, I just don’t focus on them. I know that the most important thing for me is God has always been there and walked me through whatever chaos was ensuing around me. He has always placed awesome people in my path just when I needed them the most. If you are reading this and not a believer in God – please read on. Don’t let my mention of God scare you off. I’m not judging or berating anyone for not believing what I follow. I am merely sharing my personal experiences. Perhaps you have a higher power, maybe you don’t. The point is , find the positive, find the glitter. Don’t focus on the negative. No matter how bad things get, it is possible to pull yourself out.. its a way of thinking, an attitude, a mindset.
I hope you follow me on this journey called life. Lets find the glitter together!